A Sad Day in Cyclingville

WEATHER THERE: clear, 3C, 11 km/hr tail/crosswinds
WEATHER BACK: sunny, 11C, 5 km/hr headwinds


It is a sad day in Cyclingville, my friends. I recently read an article in the newspaper describing how the driver of a pick-up truck that smashed into a group of six cyclists on the side of a highway in Quebec in May - killing three people - will not be facing any charges. Alcohol was not a factor in the crash, though the driver was apparently a volunteer firefighter on his way home after a night shift so perhaps exhaustion played a part.

It's difficult to understand how a driver didn't see a pack of six cyclists travelling on the side of a highway in broad daylight (the accident happened at 10:00 am in May). What is most shocking is that absolutely no charges are being laid - not even careless driving - after three people have died. It angers and saddens me that there will be absolutely no consequences for whatever mistake led to this tragedy. I also feel angry and sad about what message this sends to cyclists: ride at your own risk, and if you get hit and killed it's your own damn fault for being on a bike in the first place. I know that highways were built for cars, but multiple modes of transportation do exist, so peaceful coexistence is necessary. As it is, the vehicle is the unchecked bully of the road and the cyclists are their innocent victims - often with fatal consequences. Yet time and again, the bully just keeps getting a slap on the wrist - if anything at all. What a sad, awful day for cyclists everywhere.


A newspaper article describing the original crash can be read here.

Update

This is me taking a MEC "Desire" bicycle out for a test drive. Can't say I was a big fan.

It's been too long, my friends! It's been far too long.

Now that it's nearing the end of August and I haven't written a blog entry in weeks, I thought it's about damn time to give you a little update about what's been going on in HealthyBiker Land. The truth is, HealthyBiker hasn't been so healthy lately.

First of all, Mike the Bike has been out of commission since the last blog entry I wrote. So has Eastwood, my $50 mountain bike. I've been hemming and hawing about whether I should get one or both of these bikes fixed, or just buy a new and much better bike, or whether I'd even be biking again come September. A lot of those decisions couldn't be made until I knew what my plans were going to be for the upcoming school year - how much money would I be making? Would I be working full-time? How much time flexibility would I have? All of these factors would impact whether I was biking or walking and what my bike budget might be.

The truth is, it's August - fucking - 24th and I STILL don't know what's going on! I had an interview today for a potential job, I have another one scheduled for next week, I've already had two others (this is all on top of working full-time and being a single freakin' parent to The Tantrum Queen). And as of this moment I am no closer to knowing the answers to any of those pressing questions. This, despite the fact that September is ONE WEEK AWAY.

I can't say that I handle this uncertainty well. In fact, this is the kind of thing that causes me to stress out so much I develop Irritable Bowel Syndrome (that's a fact, my friends: I did actually develop a one-time, months-long bout of IBS while I was waiting to hear whether I was accepted into the PhD program a few years ago - which is, I guess, marginally better than having an intestinal parasite).

This is also the kind of thing that causes me to overeat . . . and by that I mean binge. Hard. That utterly useless coping mechanism, combined with a complete absence of biking and any other form of exercise for that matter, has left me feeling like all the health benefits I gained from the hard work of the past 11 months of bike-commuting has been completely erased by the last six weeks of shitty living. I know I've gained weight - a distressing amount, in fact, given the short time I've gained it in. I feel remarkably unfit. I know all this has to stop - I need to get my eating habits back under control and get back into some kind of exercise routine, like, say, getting back on the freakin' bike already!!!! At the same time, I feel just as stuck about my decision-making abilities today as I did six weeks ago.

While waiting for time to provide me with some much-needed answers, I've been dragging my ass slowly and bitterly to the finish line of my internship (which has been a truly fabulous experience, and also utterly exhausting). Today I spent some time cleaning out my office in between seeing some of my clients for the last time. It's kind of sad because I have to end these relationships, yet it's also kind of triumphant because so many of my clients are doing so much better than they were before that it feels like I'm watching formerly wounded birds fly back into the wild again after a full recovery. It's emotional, and rewarding, and altogether stressful.

I couldn't take the waiting game anymore. I contacted BikeWorks, the awesome do-it-yourself bike shop run by the Edmonton Bike Commuters Society, to see if they would be able to fix Mike the Bike for me. They said they don't operate like that - that a volunteer mechanic could help me fix Mike, but that I'd have to do the work. Since I work full-time and have my daughter on my hip every moment I'm not at work, that's something I just don't have the time to do, but the lovely and helpful Anna from BikeWorks got me in touch with one of the volunteer mechanics who would be able to fix Mike the Bike for a much more reasonable rate than a bike shop service department would charge. So, daughter on my hip and Mike the Bike stuffed into my trunk, I drove Mike out to this mechanic's garage and got a quote - the $300 fix-up quoted by the bike shop was now going to cost me $100. Done deal!

So, Mike is now officially in repair. My front porch seems so empty without his presence. In the meantime, my fingers keep drawing me to the new and improved Revolution Cycle website where they have a list of bikes on sale. It is a very good time of year to buy a new bike, isn't it, my fellow bike-commuters? I have a very good mind to say "fuck it all!!" and just get Mike repaired for use as a beater bike and invest some money on a brand spankin' new general purpose bike. When it would appear that I can get a pretty decent bike for under $800 at Revolution Cycle right now, why the hell not??

I wish I could tell you something about the job situation for the coming year. I wish I could tell you more about what bike I'm going to get. I wish I could tell you when I'm even going to get Mike back. But I can't. So I'll check out the bikes on sale at Revolution Cycle, I'll keep in touch with the awesome bike mechanic, and I'll keep trying to get my life in order for September. And I promise, after that several week hiatus I just inflicted upon you, I'll be very sure to keep you posted from now on!!

Week 46 - Day Three: Rained Out/Mechanical Failure

Yesterday I didn't bike because of the rain. When I drove to work in the morning, I felt small pangs of guilt about leaving the bike at home as I saw a couple cyclists out braving the mild rain that was falling. Throughout the day, as the rain turned into overcast skies, I felt worse. Should I have just braved it myself? Then came the drive home: it was raining hard when I first left work, and torrential downpours came in fits and bursts. There were moments when the rain pelted my car sideways because the wind was so strong. There were moments when I could barely see beyond the hood of my car, even with my wipers going full-speed, because the rain was coming down so hard and fast. There were no cyclists out, no pedestrians. I didn't even see people waiting at bus stops. It was insane. That ride home made me feel perfectly justified in taking the car to work.

Yesterday evening, I spent some time on my bike preparing it for a bike-commute for today: I tightened the headset, filled up the tires, and lubricated the chain, as the last rainy ride washed off a lot of the lube. During this preparatory period, I noticed I had a loose spoke on the back tire. I wiggled it, and it came off - another broken spoke. That would be #7 on that rim. Out of 24 spokes. Now, I knew when I bought that bike that one comment in the reviews was "it's not a curb-jumper", and I've tried to go relatively easy on it as a result. A broken spoke here and there hasn't surprised me. But seven?? Come on!!

I'm right back to that point where I have a serious dilemma on my hands, just as I did a couple weeks ago that last time a spoke broke on me. Do I replace the spoke, as I eventually did last time? Do I refurbish the whole bike (i.e., replace the chain, replace the back rim, give it a tune-up and a thorough wash, etc.)? Do I replace the whole bike with a better, more expensive one, especially if I'm going to continue bike-commuting for the foreseeable future? Or do I give up on bike-commuting for the time being?

This dilemma is more complicated than it might seem. Starting in September, my internship will be over and my time will more flexible because I'll be exclusively working on my dissertation. Given that flexibility, I'm planning to walk-commute to school instead of bike-commuting because I no longer need the time-efficiency of the bike and I prefer walking as a form of exercise. Further, I *may* be moving to another city as soon as January 2011, and I'm not sure whether I'll be able to bike- or walk-commute wherever I end up. ALSO, I'm facing the expense of having to buy a laptop so I can work on my dissertation from a school-based office, so I'm not sure how feasible it is to buy an expensive bike and a laptop around the same time. After all, I'm still a student and a single parent, so money is always an issue.

I need to consider this more thoroughly. As much as I'd love a new bike, I don't think I can justify an expense like that at this time. Even good used bikes are not cheap. Should I repair my current bike and finish off my year of commuting with it, even if it might cost a couple hundred dollars to do that and I might not use it much anymore beyond the end of August? And what if I can bike-commute wherever I end up after I move, then shouldn't I wait and just invest in a better bike?

Any thoughts, my faithful readers?? Your input would be most helpful!

Week 41 - Day Two: I Miss Walking :(

BIKE: Eastwood
TIME THERE: 23 min.
TIME BACK: 27 min. (really???)
WEATHER: overcast, 8C 19 km/hr crosswinds there; overcast, 13C, 7 km/hr crosswinds back.
WHAT I WORE: yoga pants, t-shirt, sweatshirt
NOTES:

The saddle sores are acting up again. I'm feeling muscle-tired and sore. I terribly miss walking, and I fantasize about leaving the bike at home one of these days and taking up walk-commuting. Of course, I can't quite do that because it would take at least a solid hour of walking each way, and my daughter's daycare isn't open long enough to allow me to do that and work a full day. So I'm stuck. I want to get out and enjoy a good walk the way I used to, especially on those beautiful sunny days when I really want to take in the scenery and the sunshine, but it seems I just can't these days. What a shame.

For the first couple years that I lived in Edmonton, I lived 5 km from the university and would walk either to and from school, or just from (I'd take the bus in the morning and then walk home in the evening). I loved this: I love the pace of walking, how I can take in the scenery while keeping a decent pace, how I can take a good long look at the things around me without fear of getting into a high-speed collision with anything, how I can listen to music instead of having to be keenly aware of traffic sounds at all times. I loved that when I walk-commuted - whether I was in Edmonton, or that summer I spent living and working in California - I was in really good shape and my body had a very balanced, well-maintained look to it. Right now I'm feeling pretty damn bottom-heavy as my thighs get heavier and more muscular. I didn't have that when I was walking - not much muscle build-up, and lots of fat loss. Sigh! I miss that!

I think I just need to pick a day when I don't have anything scheduled right at 9:00 am and just walk. I've been fantasizing about it long enough. I want to see how long it takes me to walk 6 km to work going through the river valley. I want to see if my feet and my hips can handle that much walking now that I'm older, I've given birth, and I haven't invested in really good walking shoes lately. I think that will be a very nice change of pace, and a very welcome change of scenery.

Maybe I'm just getting sick of bike-commuting. Could it be???

Week 33 - Day Five: Excuses

BIKE: Mike
TIME THERE: 28 min.
TIME BACK: (went out with co-workers after work, so I got a ride home later)
WEATHER: clear, 4C (0C with windchill), 22km/hr wind gusting up to 33 km/hr there.
WHAT I WORE: yoga pants, t-shirt, sweatshirt, running gloves
NOTES:

Every morning this week, I woke up arguing with myself about whether I should bike or drive to work. Every evening I would fervently hope to wake up to snow cover on the ground the next day so I had a good excuse not to bike. The lazy voice inside my head thought up all sorts of excuses for me - it's too windy, it's too dry, my throat still hurts, my nose is still too blocked, I'm too tired, I deserve a break, I'm sick and I need to sleep in, etc. Somehow, I managed not to talk myself out of it, and I've gotten through a week of bike-commuting while sick (with the exception of Monday, of course).

There will always be reasons not to bike. And that lazy part of my brain will always throw them at me to convince me not to bike. The point is to ignore it. Sure, there are times when it makes perfect sense not to bike - when I have to go to a meeting or appointment directly from work and wouldn't have the time to bike it, or when the weather makes it too dangerous, or when I'm just barely well enough to drag my ass to work but too sick to function as a human being. All legitimate reasons. But it's been a while since I've had a good run of multiple weeks in a row when I didn't miss a single day of biking. Maybe not even since January! That trend needs to stop. I need to get back into the habit of bike-commuting.

The good news is that it's getting nicer and nicer out, which means that fellow bike-commuters are coming out in droves. Whereas in the winter we were an elite, exclusive group of hardy winter-cyclists, I am now a part of what can only be described as a horde of cyclists that now includes the belle-weather bikers. It's nice to see everyone out, some on dreamy-looking retro cruisers and others on expensive road racers. Some decked out in flowing hippie-chic or urban-cool attire while others are in cycling jackets and spandex shorts, and others are like me in casual comfort clothes that are functional and just a tad slovenly. It's hard to talk myself out of biking when so many people are out doing it, when it's so nice outside, and when driving feels so wasteful.

There will always be excuses. I just hope I can always rely on my will power to rebuke them.

Week Twenty-Seven - Day Five: Gross

BIKE: Mike
TIME THERE: 26 min.
TIME BACK: 27 min.
WEATHER: clear, -2C, 9 km/hr wind there; clear, 9C, 9 km/hr wind back.
WHAT I WORE: yoga pants, t-shirt, sweatshirt, running gloves, balaclava (balaclava in panniers on the way home)
NOTES:

Sometimes, I lose faith in humanity.

I know - what gives? It's a beautiful day, the sun is shining and it's warm outside and there's a palpable sense of hope that winter may really and finally be over. I was in a great mood today, really, for all those reasons and more . . . until I came across this picture and the accompanying commentary.

This distressed me for several reasons:
1. Because some people insist that if you aren't personally affected by a tragedy, you have no right to have any emotional reaction to it (basically: SCREW YOU, EMPATHY!).
2. Because some people insist that if you can't laugh at someone's tragic death, you're putting on some "mock indignation" and are a total pussy.
3. Because there are people in the world who enjoy this picture because it's a car plowing through a pack of cyclists, and as drivers who hate cyclists they wish this would happen more often.

Shudder. Sometimes when I think of the anger and self-righteousness of some drivers, so protected as they sit surrounded in their 2000 lbs of metal and safety features, who disparage the rights of remarkably vulnerable cyclists with whom they share the road, I lose faith in people. And I also lose faith in people when I read someone arguing that there is no difference between viewing a picture of a real-life tragedy and watching a fiction film. Really, people??

Good Lord! What's this world coming to??

Week Twenty-Three - Day Four: No Love

BIKE: Mike
TIME THERE: 30 min.
TIME BACK: 28 min. (woot!)
WEATHER: overcast, -9C (-15C with wind chill), 13 km/hr wind there; overcast, -9C, 9 km/hr wind back.
WHAT I WORE: fleece pants, turtleneck, fleece mid-layer jacket, lobster gloves, balaclava
NOTES:

Oh, fellow Edmontonians, can't we just live in peace?

Yesterday on the way home from work, I got a "Try using the bike lane!" yelled at me from a passing car. This morning, a black Escalade (I can only assume it was driven by a drug dealer and/or pimp) drove past and someone - a passenger-side woman, just like yesterday - verbally assaulted me with "Get off the road!" Perhaps she was just frustrated with her work as the pimp's #2 Bitch (there are hierarchies everywhere, collaboration be damned). Still, that kind of behaviour isn't necessary. Especially along Stony Plain Road, which is wide and generally clear of snow and upon which I'm able to ride so far to the right that cars can pass me without even moving out of the lane. Come to think of it, the woman who yelled at me from the Escalade was actually driving two lanes over from me, so I really don't understand what caused her to release her inner demons on me. Anyway . . . I was still reeling from this when, further along in my ride, I was crossing at an intersection when a bus that was not yet at the intersection in question honked at me as though I'd somehow cut it off - which, by the way, I hadn't.

Oh, President Barack Obama, we have so much more in common than you might think. You're trying to get beyond bipartisanship and bring in policy that works for your country regardless of which party it represents. I'm also straddling the line between two opposing groups - I am a cyclist, and I'm also a driver. I love both methods of transportation, do my best to follow the rules and stay safe regardless of my vehicle of choice, and can appreciate both perspectives on whether cyclists should be allowed on roadways or not. I would love to bring together the drivers and the cyclists and engage in some meaningful debate about policies that affect the safety and efficiency of how everyone gets around, whether they're in a 6000 lb Hummer or riding a 20 lb road bike (though, I must state my bias: anyone who thinks they need to own and drive a Hummer is probably an asshole). But the two sides are so divided! Is it even possible to share love between cyclists and drivers, or is this a lost cause?

After days like yesterday and today, I'm feeling pretty doubtful that we'll ever see eye to eye. And all I'm thinking as I'm cycling along is, "Come on, drivers: where is the love?"

Week Fifteen - Day One

All day yesterday, a debate raged within the confines of my brain: should I bike tomorrow, or should I not? Has the snow been cleared enough that it's not too much of a danger? And if I do go, which bike do I use? Eastwood is better on snow, Mike is better on ice, and the roads out there are currently sporting a bunch of snow over a thick layer of ice. Hmm.

I went to bed last night determined to ride to work, and also determined to take Eastwood so I can plow over and through the piles of snow without fear of getting stuck. It's settled, I'm doing it!

And then I had a terrible night. My daughter was up several times, just about every hour, and from about 9:00 pm last night I've been feeling some pretty un-fun stomach pains. Through the night and into today, I've been hit by waves of nausea and I feel as though something is burrowing a hole from my stomach through my intestines. I know, it sounds cool, but it actually isn't very pleasant.

I woke up this morning exhausted and still feeling unwell. There is no way I'm biking today! Hell, I don't even want to go in to work - I just want to curl up in a blankie and sleep all day. But I'm so short of hours after staying home with my daughter when she had the flu that it's just not an option to stay home. So I drove to work, having to rock myself out of large piles of snow TWICE. Driving in this weather really isn't much more pleasant than biking might be!

I haven't eaten anything all day, and now that it's lunch I'm trying a cup of chicken noodle soup to see if I can stomach it. It actually feels very good. Perhaps when I get home, I'll make some soup for dinner (I think all I've got is onion soup mix, but it's better for a sore tummy than leftover sausauge - *puke*). I've had two clients this morning plus an intake client, and I've been steadily fading all morning. I have no idea how I'm supposed to get through another three hours of clients this afternoon. During the last session of the morning, I actually had to pause for a moment and make a snap decision whether I should vomit in the waste basket or see if I can make it to the bathroom in time just in case that particular wave of nausea got to that point.

I can hardly keep my eyes open. My stomach hurts. I don't want to see any more clients or write case notes or take care of my daughter when I get home tonight. I just want to curl up in a fetal position and sleep, waiting for whatever's got a grip on me to let go. But alas, responsibilities - those crazy bastards - they just won't let me be, even when I'm sick and I wish everything could be put on hold just for a few hours until I feel better.

But I guess I just have to keep on keepin' on.

The Great Debate

A great debate rages on in my fair city over where cyclists belong: on the road, on the sidewalk, or one specially designated bike paths. We have access to a fabulous and massive system of trails and multi-use (pedestrian and wheeled but not motorized vehicles like bikes and rollerblades) pathways through our beautiful river valley. While this system is ideal for recreational and athletic uses, it's less convenient for commuters because it's limited to the curvy path the river cuts through the city - so if you don't live or work along that path, too bad for you - and as far as I know it is not cleared of snow in the winter (I believe the pathways become cross-country skiing trails during the winter months). Currently, the city has some areas with dedicated bike paths where cyclists share the right of way with pedestrians and operate essentially as a sidewalk where bikes are permitted. There are also a number of on-road bike routes where the roads are slightly wider and bikes are expected to operate under the same rules as a motor vehicle. Then the rest of the city consists of regular roads, which cyclists are permitted to share with cars.

There are some important considerations in this debate. Safety is the biggest issue - where are most people going to be safest? That must include cyclists as well as pedestrians and drivers. Other considerations include space and money - it would be lovely if cyclists and pedestrians could each have their own path systems so there are no more bicycle-pedestrian, bicycle-car, or car-pedestrian accidents ever again, but in most urban spaces there would never be the money or space to allow for such systems (let alone what kind of confusion might arise at intersections). There are also other considerations that transportation planners would know much more about than I, but those seem to me to be the most obvious.

I've heard the argument that cyclists belong on the road because they are going much faster than pedestrians and for all intents and purposes are often treated by city bylaws as vehicles. These bylaws have then set in place the expectation that bicycles have the same rights and responsibilities as cars, so there's some predictability in terms of rights of way and behaviour on the road. On the other hand, others claim that cyclists aren't going nearly as fast as cars and are in much greater danger for injury when competing with cars for road space than they (or pedestrians) are when competing for footpath-space.

I'm not fully convinced where I stand on this issue. I don't think it's fair to equate bicycles with cars because, with the exception of competitive cyclists, most commuters are going less than one-third the speed of the cars they are sharing the roads with, and the weight difference between bicycles and cars makes them even more incomparable as modes of transportation. Further, the potential for fatalities is much greater between cyclists and cars than between cyclists and pedestrians. On sidewalks that are mostly empty of pedestrian traffic, there is no question for me that bikes should be there and not mingling with car traffic. However, the problems arise when dealing with busy, high-traffic footpaths. In my limited experience trying to navigate my bicycle through the throngs of students packed onto the common areas of my campus, I find myself wishing there were pedestrian-free roads I could take instead. The likelihood of collisions is great because people are walking in all different directions, instead of with roads where lanes keep directional traffic separate, and again because of a lack of lanes people walk in path-blocking clusters, can stop or change direction quite abruptly, and in general behave in remarkably unpredictable ways. This, combined with the very utilitarian concern of space, means that my biking speed drops dramatically and I am on constant lookout for possible collisions when I share a busy path with pedestrians. In this instance, it is without question better for bikes to be on the road.

So the debate rages on, and I follow the letters-to-the editor and op-ed articles in the newspaper with interest. I don't believe there are any easy solutions, and I'm very grateful that people are thinking about and discussing this issue. After all, wouldn't it be nice to start planning now for the transportation infrastructure decisions that will shape the future of our cities? As more people turn to bicycles as an affordable, healthy, green solution to their transportation needs, the issues at the heart of this debate will only become more critical.